The Joy of Hex Read online

  A spike of magic jolted into my core. My own pleasure increased. I realized what he was doing, not so different from my own unraveling. He funneled his pleasure into me, making me stronger. He was fueling my own magic.

  The inferno inside him raged white-hot. It churned and coiled, flaring in spikes. He was close, but I wasn’t.

  Sweat dripped down his face despite the chill.

  He stopped thrusting and sat up. He shifted me off him. I sat back onto the earth beside him, uncertain what had happened. Neither of us had come.

  I tried not to look at the leering faces in the shadows.

  I placed a hand on his chest. “Felix?” I couldn’t tell whether he was in control again and his inhibitions had returned or something else was wrong.

  He was shaking as he leaned in to pluck a kiss from my lips. “I love you,” he said. “I made you an oath, and I intend to keep it.”

  I wasn’t sure whether he meant our marriage vows or the oath Elric had asked him to make in exchange for a favor. Thatch had promised to protect me. I hadn’t made that easy for him considering how I had come back here for him.

  He gathered me into his arms, more gently than before as he sat me on his lap. His lips twitched, and I realized he was trying to smile. He kissed my temple and my hair. His lips on my skin were ardent, but not frenzied like before.

  I would have liked to lose myself in the passion of the moment, to forget the world as he caressed me and made me aroused. But I also knew he wouldn’t be able to sustain this control. It was a wonder he managed this amount of restraint. I pinched him and raked my nails against his back to supply him with pain, his drug of choice. He moaned against my breasts and continued stroking me.

  Though there was a certain urgency and fervor in him, his mind was present. He was as considerate and attentive as he’d always been.

  “What’s he doing?” a creature with a raspy voice asked.

  “Hush,” said the queen. “He’s ensuring she lives long enough to produce an heir. Observe and learn.”

  I looked up to see the queen watching from only a few feet away with her court. They stood far closer than I liked. I didn’t know where Odette had gone. I hoped she had escaped while attention had been focused on us. Not that I thought she could escape for long. She was in the Raven Queen’s service and could be summoned when her sovereign wished. So long as Queen Morgaine’s magic worked in place of the heart that had been removed, she would never be free.

  I wondered whether my husband really would be free after this.

  Thatch clutched me tighter, squeezing the air out of me before pushing me away. He gasped and raked his hands through his hair. He was losing it again.

  The prince with the bird beak for a nose stepped forward. “He’s failed. It’s my turn with her.” He took hold of my elbow, attempting to pull me back.

  “He has not failed yet,” the Raven Queen said.

  This didn’t stop the other prince from trying to haul me off. I punched his arm, and when that didn’t work, I elbowed him in the crotch. Thatch’s cousin groaned and leapt back.

  Thatch’s eyes were closed. He rocked back and forth. I slapped him across the face to bring him back into the present. He sighed in relief and leaned toward me, inviting more pain.

  The queen waved her hand toward her birdbrained grandson, and the man with the beak tumbled back as though caught in a gust of wind.

  “I did not give you permission to have her,” the Raven Queen said. “You may take your leave from tonight’s entertainment.”

  The man somersaulted back, rolled into a tree, and bowled into a group of imps. He clung to roots as he tried to keep from being tossed farther.

  “Clarissa.” Felix Thatch’s voice drew my attention. “Look at me.”

  I returned my gaze to his eyes. They remained black. It wasn’t the most reassuring sight. Still, his face was better than looking at the Raven Court.

  His arms quaked with exertion as he drew me against him onto the ground and rolled over onto his side. “Do you trust me not to hurt you?”

  I swallowed. “Maybe.”

  “Turn away and close your eyes so you don’t see them.”

  I rolled over and closed my eyes, but not before catching a glimpse of the macabre sight of little imps fornicating with a skull.

  He slid his arm underneath my neck to give me a pillow. Warmth brushed against my skin as he kissed a trail down my neck and across my shoulder. I tried to answer his gentleness with the brutality he needed by digging my fingers into tender bruises on his arm. I worried I wouldn’t be able to reach him enough from this position to help him maintain control.

  His breath came out in pained little pants. The Passion’s Kiss was threatening to overwhelm him again. He turned my chin toward him, craning his neck to reach my mouth with his, tongue tasting and then withdrawing. He slid his hand under my knee and lifted it to rest on his legs. He slowly eased himself inside me.

  I didn’t need to separate out pleasure from pain. This was all ecstasy now.

  He closed his hand around my breast, massaging my flesh. I gouged my fingers into the lacerations on his hands, telling him without words how good it felt. He circled his thumb around my nipple. Pining flushed through me. He pinched hard enough to push against my threshold for pain but not cross it. I cried out with desire.

  He rocked me against him as he thrust. His fingers caressed my hip and kneaded my pelvic bone. He slipped his fingers between my legs and stroked.

  My heart lurched in my chest. Pleasure spiked inside me. He pushed deeper, harder, as if reaching for some secret place inside my soul.

  His breath was hot against my ear. “Tell me you love me.”

  “I do. I love you. I will always love you.” Each sentence came out in a rush between thrusts.

  “Say my name.”

  The heat built inside me. “Felix Thatch, I love you.” There was more to his words than pillow talk, but I was too distracted to glean the meaning behind his request.

  “Tell me you need me.”

  “I need you.” These were the words Elric had told me Thatch needed to hear when he had been too afraid to break Quenylda’s spell for fear of hurting me or making me hate him. “Felix, I need you inside me.”

  The intensity inside me swelled.

  Everywhere our bodies contacted each other thrummed with electricity. His hand tingled against my flesh. His lips sparked electricity under my skin. “Tell me I’m yours.”

  “You’re mine, Felix Thatch. You will always be mine.”

  Magic was at work, more than sex magic or the Fae Fertility Paradox. I could feel the spell in his words, even if I didn’t understand it. He wasn’t going to be able to share his plan with me either, whatever it was.

  I trusted him to save us.

  “I am your champion. Your servant. I pledged myself to you. Correct?”

  “Yes.”

  He momentarily thrust harder. Electricity built inside me, the wave of energy so high I thought it would topple. The sensation wavered and plateaued.

  He stopped. “Say it. You have to say it. Tell me no other can have me but you.”

  “You are my champion. My servant. You pledged yourself to me.” I suspected I understood the magic at work here. This was as serious as Wiseman’s Oath. It was more binding than our marriage vows. “You are my husband and can belong to no other.”

  He started moving his pelvis against mine, though more slowly. The magic threatened to spill out of me, but he stopped again. “Tell her no other may have you. Only me.”

  “Only you can have me. I love only you, Felix Thatch.” I opened my eyes to find the Raven Queen glowering at us.

  She sat on a creature kneeling on all fours. Her eyes narrowed. She understood what we were doing, but she didn’t stop us.

  The whispering heat of his breath brushed against my neck, sending a tickle down my spine. “No other can have us in body, heart, or soul.”
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  I repeated the words. He pushed deeper inside me. I arched into him, inviting him into my magic. His breath came out in growling pants. I cried out as a sea of warmth rose inside me.

  Colors swam before my eyes. Ecstasy flooded over me in throbbing waves. Cold and heat surged from him, radiating through me. Electricity crackled in the air around us. Creatures shifted back. Around us, electricity wove a grid of wards. The patterns reminded me of the lace of his tattoos, runes flashing in protection.

  My skin felt as though I were on fire. My core churned with electricity. The circuit of our magic danced faster and faster between us, but I couldn’t contain it. He spoke, but I couldn’t hear him. The Red affinity threatened to explode.

  Instead, it imploded, sucking me within.

  CHAPTER SIX

  Metaphors and Metamorphosis

  Cold fire burned through me, consuming my senses. I was no longer in my body, but I wasn’t outside of it either. It was like before when we’d been in the Raven Court and the queen had insisted on observing us use sex magic and later in the Silver Court when Thatch and I had orgasmed at the same time.

  I transformed, aware of the shift in me and the world around me. I was no longer in this time or space. My body wasn’t human anymore.

  I floated in the stars, the cold of space prickling across my body. I felt primal and animal, grounded in some force deep inside me. My body didn’t feel like my own. I was no longer flesh. Our magic had transformed me into something otherworldly and scaled.

  All physical sensations that had been there moments ago faded. I was weightless, floating in space. Starlight as cold as snowflakes prickled across my body, the sensation welcome. I stared at the stars glittering around me in the cosmos. It was calm and quiet in this realm. I was detached from mortal foibles and earthly woes. The Raven Court felt so far away. My problems felt far away.

  Nothing existed outside this moment.

  I stretched and luxuriated in the feeling of uncurling myself, of having enough space to extend my limbs. My human body felt like a dream. This was the real me.

  I was a pale dragon with a long serpentlike body. Scales shimmered as if I were made of the same fabric as the twinkling stars around me. The cosmos shifted in a caress against me. I became aware that I wasn’t alone.

  My mate embraced me, surrounding me, the indigo of his scales sliding against mine. Even without Felix Thatch’s face, I knew it was him. I tasted his magic in the air, starlight masquerading as Celestor magic and knowledge made tangible in the scent of dusty books. He was lavender and lightning. The Red affinity thrived in him, blood and pain a sacrifice for his magic.

  Whereas I was bright and full of the glittering light of stars, he was dark and made of shadows, reminding me of the space in between the stars. He filled the void inside me and made my heart swell with joy. My love overflowed with abundance.

  The writhing of our bodies was like snakes mating on warm rocks. Only we weren’t snakes. We had wings, arms, and legs.

  We were dragons.

  The last time we had transformed, the moment had been fleeting. I hadn’t been able to grasp what had happened or remembered it anywhere vividly aside from my dreams. Everything was crisp and clear in this body and in this mind. I thought of the paintings in Jeb’s office of cowboys wrangling miniature dragons the size of cattle. I was larger than mountains. I could spread out and keep spreading across continents if I wanted.

  Fae thought they could contain us, to capture us and make us theirs. The Raven Queen was puny and insignificant compared to my splendor. Our splendor.

  Thatch nudged me, his long neck craning to keep up with me as I expanded. His tail curved around mine and curled me into the spiral of his embrace. I nuzzled against him, savoring this sanctuary where we could love and dance with no else to bother us. We were safe.

  For the moment.

  I could already feel my mortal body tugging at me, wanting me to return. We were only safe so long as we stayed here. I didn’t want this peace with myself and the universe to leave me.

  Thatch’s body coiled around mine, hugging me to him. His scales glistened like an oil slick, midnight compared to the pink dawn of my own. One eye blinked in the side of his head, a stormy gray iris flecked with red. Warily, he watched me snuggle into him. He hid one side from me as he embraced me.

  The last time we’d been in this form, he hadn’t wanted me to see his wound. Perhaps he’d been afraid of what I might do after so many others he’d loved before had hurt him. But I had healed the armor that protected his heart. I shifted around him, curious, wanting to know whether he was better.

  I thought I saw something twinkle red in the twisted jumble of our limbs. I nudged his arm aside and wiggled my snout toward the light.

  He tensed and tried to twist away. He was being silly. I wanted to tell him I wouldn’t hurt him. He should have known that about me by now. I hadn’t hurt him before.

  He only stopped trying to twist away when my snout stopped just before his wound. I no longer saw the pulsing heart, exposed for anyone to come along and hurt. Instead I found a scar, deep and puckered. It appeared more like a chink in the armor of his soul rather than a gaping weakness. I caressed my face against the malformed scales nearest to the wound, radiating love and magic to heal him. The wariness in him eased away. I licked his belly, sweeping my forked tongue across his inhuman flesh.

  My human body called, but I ignored it.

  The languid serenity of his muscles shifted. I suspected he felt it too. That’s when I noticed the red light flicker once again. He shifted against me, tension building in him as he tightened around me, trying to keep me still. The light pulsed from somewhere in the coils of our tangled limbs.

  There was something he was keeping from me. Something he didn’t want me to know. Another secret.

  I had thought it was his wound. Last time I had thought so as well, but now I wasn’t so certain. I released the fight from my limbs and rested my cheek against him, feigning indifference to the red light flashing between our bodies.

  The moment he relaxed, I pounced. I dove my head and long neck between our bodies and nudged him aside. He contracted around me, but his attempt to stop me came too late. I had found his secret.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  The Ruby of Divine Wisdom

  The red light came from an oval nestled among a dozen others, yet only this one pulsed. The exterior was faceted, the surface reminding me of scales. I couldn’t tell whether it was a ruby or an egg. There were moments I thought I saw a shape within, but it was too bright to gaze at directly.

  Power radiated from the orb. It felt as though it contained all the knowledge of the world. Was this the Ruby of Divine Wisdom, the fabled stone Alouette Loraline had supposedly possessed? Perhaps this was knowledge inside all Red affinities, a gift to those who reached enlightenment.

  Or perhaps it was like the pearl in an oyster, a lure before the shell clapped closed with one’s fingers still inside.

  That would be how a Fae would plan it. But there were no Fae here. We weren’t Fae or Witchkin in this realm. We didn’t need to follow the rules of earth. There were different rules here.

  I just didn’t know what those rules were.

  Thatch nudged my face with his nose, his breath hot against mine. His gray eye blinked, mournful. He moaned, the lullaby like a whale song full of sorrow and regret. I felt that tugging inside me again, the desire to return to my human body. But I was aware the desire to retreat didn’t come from me.

  The urge to return came from outside my body. It came from him. The first time I’d only been a dragon for a fleeting second. The second time had been longer, while Thatch had been distracted as I’d healed his wound. He would have stopped me from staying this long, but I’d resisted. Now here I was.

  This was our nest of eggs. Our rubies. Our wisdom.

  I suddenly understood. The Ruby of Divine Wisdom was a dragon’s egg.

 
; He hugged me tighter, fear radiating off him. I wanted to reassure him, to tell him it was all right. This was what I needed. I could feel it. If I touched the ruby, I would be able to do anything. My full magic would be unleashed.

  I closed the short gap between me and the ruby. I touched my nose to it. The ruby exploded. Blinding light filled my vision. Knowing overwhelmed me.

  A star was born.

  New life grew within me.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  How Not to Tame a Dragon

  Something shifted and quickened inside me. Vertigo washed over me as up became down and down became up. I didn’t know whether I was human or animal. My body contracted and expanded, the confines of my limbs too small.

  A flutter of nausea rose in my belly. The cold night consumed me.

  I wanted to think about what I had just experienced, discuss it, and analyze the significance. An incredible amount of power blazed inside me. The Red affinity that dwelled in my core didn’t feel as much intangible and magical as solid. I pressed a hand to my belly, wondering whether that lump was my imagination.

  Was I feeling the Ruby of Divine Wisdom, or was I feeling a child growing inside me? It was life, though I didn’t know what kind of life.

  If only I weren’t so tired, I might have been able to figure it out.

  Thunder boomed, and lightning crackled over my exposed human skin. Tatters of my slip clung to me. In my dragon form I felt strong. As I returned to my human self, I was weak and vulnerable.

  I thought I heard screams, but I was so exhausted I could barely open my eyes. I only looked because Thatch shifted, and I fell away from him. I was tired, my movements too slow to stop me from rolling onto the ground. My insides ached. I felt as though I might have been burned by Thatch’s lightning when he’d come inside me.

  The Raven Court swarmed around us in chaos. I couldn’t tell whether they were coming or going. Lightning flashed. The light hurt my head.

  I squeezed my eyes shut so I didn’t have to see leering faces or the Raven Queen’s grin. Magic blazed inside me. Without even intending to use my powers of awareness, I sensed her stalking closer. She parted the shadows and reached for me.